March 2013
As my first act as Pope, I would trade in the Pope-Mobile for a candy-apple red '57 Chevy convertible - (a Pope should look cool!) I would also turn over all evidence and documentation on pedophile Priests to the proper law authorities for prosecution - Lets get those pervy priests out of the priories and into prison where they belong! I would work on promoting ecumenical understandings with the Jewish and Muslim faiths, by inviting their leaders to the Vatican and giving them complimentary Pope Hats - perhaps might even invite the Protestants as well (Except for the Mormons and Baptists - those guys are just too irritating!) As Pope, I would ask God to cool it with this Global Warming - because drowning everyone in the Maldives really isn't good PR... Or wait - are they Catholics in the Maldive Islands? I dunno... Well, if they aren't, I guess it's okay then... And most importantly: FREE Pizzas for Everyone!! As for this month's Calendar: You all remember that I'm doing a new on-line comix, don't you? (www.bunzandkatz.com) Well... It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood for Bunz and Katz - as we sort of Celebrate the Multiple Dooms which we're been through recently - the Mayan calendar bust - the Fiscal Cliff and other Administrative/Congressional blunders - Meteors - and of course, the Planet X Loonies just never give up on it! Though, thinkin' about the "Fiscal Cliff/Sequester"... What is it with Congress and the Administration? Over and over again we get these artificially manufactured fiscal crises - isn't this getting a li'l old? How many of you are still buying into this?!? Hey, we're the US, we've got assets! Like the Military always wants more money - yet the Navy is about to scrap the USS Enterprise (CVN65) - Wake Up! That's a Nuclear Aircraft Carrier - How many countries out there have even One Nuclear Aircraft Carrier?? The Military wants more money - put that thing on eBay! Start the Bidding!! Or the Capital building, how 'bout that? Congress spends most of its time on vacations and junkets - the place is sitting empty half the time... RENT it out! Turn it into a Hostel for people visiting DC! Most of the Congress people won't even notice - They can phone in their votes - they don't need to be there! Think about it, there's plenty of other assets we could sell off - we might even sell a State... Like say, Mississippi (the State not the River) - How many of you would actually miss Mississippi if we sold it? Raise your hands - See?? No Prob - We can eBay Mississippi right after we do the Enterprise! And with those fiscally frugal thoughts - I seem to have typed enough for this month... JQ |